Incarnational leadership is never about yourself; it’s always about others. It’s never about elevating yourself, or about exerting your power, or gaining personally. Instead, leadership is about using your gifts, abilities, resources, and vision to make a difference for others. That difference can be as simple as helping someone master a concept (as a teacher), or as complex as heading up a global peace initiative.

Whether in your family, your job, your church, your community, or the place you work, it’s all about making progress for others. THAT is what servant leadership does.

Arguably the greatest leader in history, Jesus of Nazareth is recorded in the Gospel of John, chapter nine, as saying that if you want to be great, you must be the servant of all.

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Coming up next: Misconceptions of Servant Leadership

Leadership is essential to achieving your goals. In most cases, you can’t achieve them by yourself. You are going to need help. But you are the one who sees the vision the clearest and tastes it the strongest, so you’ve got to help the people around you—people who in my case God put there—see the same vision you see. You’ve got to lead them.

True leadership is in short supply. There are many people in corner offices with big titles, but far fewer who are truly incarnational leaders—the type who embody the vision.

I’ve reflected a lot on leadership recently trying to understand why it was in such short supply. I’ve concluded that leadership deficiencies stem from mistrust. The average person believes people in leadership are in it for themselves, and many are. Those who are positions of leadership often assume others have the same self-interests they do, and so in order to protect their position and the benefits it gives them they refuse to make way for more capable younger or newer leaders. Those self interests can be financial, but more often they are about power (which is way over-rated); simply lording it over others. I’ve seen this happen in church, in organizations, and in companies with which I’ve been involved. Invariably it goes back to small people so insecure in themselves and so unconfident in who they are that they hold a tight grip on their own church, or company, or organization and strangle the life from it by holding on.

It happens over, and over again in the same cycle. Children see it in their parents and then exhibit it in their own adult lives; planting the same seeds of distrust, watering them with incapability, and eventually reaping a harvest of un-success, all because they don’t understand what leadership is.

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Coming up next: Leadership Means Making Progress for Others

When you have clarity and a big, impactful vision it creates its own gravitational force that compels you to serve it and propels you forward toward achievement.

Decked out festively in maroon and white as she headed to her season-reserved seat on the third-row at half-court in the 10,000 seat JQH arena at Missouri State University, and feeling the pride of team spirit, from out of left field my wife abruptly opined as to why Islam was rapidly gaining new adherents. “It’s their uniforms,” she said, referencing the hajib or burqa that Muslim women wear. “People like to dress for their team, and Islam requires the women to dress in the team uniform. That’s why Islam is growing.”

She has a good point buried in her larger, I think not-fully-thought-out, assessment. People do like to dress for their team, and Islam enforces dress on its women, and that enforcement of appearance likely does provide some form of security for mislead believers. In fact, the rules of religion have provided mankind the security of defined boundaries for centuries. I’m reminded of the research that was done at the elementary school where they took down the fence around the playground. Previously the students had played all over the playground—even up against the chain link fence. But when the fence was removed, children began playing much closer to the building. When the fence was reinstalled, the once again played out to the edge of the fence line. Humans are comforted by boundaries. Religious rules and dress codes provide boundaries offering clear lines of distinction in which unthinking people find security.  Dress like this and go to Heaven. Dress like that and go to Hell. Do this, say this, believe this, act like this, and you’ll either have favor with God and live a glorious afterlife, or you are toast, depending on which edict you follow.

“We Christians should have uniforms,” Kelly said. Ah, no dear. We tried that. External signs and symbols don’t appease God. The Old Testament God followers were all about rules and regulations. Wear this. Wash this many times. Don’t do that on this day but do do this on that day. If you followed the rules meticulously, Diety was happy. And if you didn’t………. And nobody could……….

Enter Jesus saying things like “Its not what goes into a man from the outside, but what comes from the inside of a man that defiles him.” (Mark 7:15) The point being that man doesn’t need an exterior wash, but an interior scrubbing. With a few symbolic exceptions and those of a sexual nature, the issues aren’t dress code, uniforms, or religious rules invented by man. The issue is internal. It’s about the condition of the heart. It’s either in alignment with God, evidenced by profession and deed, or it’s out of alignment with God, typically evidenced by word and deed. Jesus died on the cross to bridge the God-Man gap created by that misalignment, and lives within those who profess Him constantly reshaping malleable hearts back into alignment with the values, desires, attributes and behaviors of God.

One of the great challenges for those of us who follow Jesus is to keep our hearts soft toward Him; perpetually malleable and not hard. When a Christ-follower hardens his heart its like driving a car on which the steering locks up. The driver can no longer direct it, and the ditch awaits it. In different measure all of us who follow Him have experienced that sudden loss of steering, and some of us have learned how important it is when you feel yourself clutching the wheel too tightly to loosen up and let God remain the driver.

Do we need team uniforms? Not so much. That’s easy religion; easily performed without much thought or commitment, and readily apparent but not necessarily significant. So wear whatever you like. In fact, the variety of color, fabric, and style is in keeping with how God created the world—many splendored and full of variety—mountains and valleys, deserts and streams, flowers of every color, animals in every style. I think when God looks upon those who call Him Father and sees their color and attire he enjoys the beauty and uniqueness.

When God opens the “closet of the heart” that’s where He wants to find conformity; not with each other, but with Him. If what hangs in that closet indicates you aren’t a member of the team, there is only one way to fix that. You can’t shop for a new wardrobe in team colors, you have to receive it it on your knees where the Father and King places His own robe on the shoulders of the one who kneels before Him as he welcomes them into His family and calls them His son or daughter. One of Jesus’ contemporaries, John, wrote it this way “To all who receive Him, who believe in His name, to them He gave the right to become the children of God.” (John 1:12)

“Hey Honey, have you seen my letter jacket? I want to be sure when we get to the big game that everybody knows I’m on the team.”

I got a little extra time in the physician’s exam room this week. Came out with a clean bill of cardiac health. Turns out it is all that resistance training that is making my chest hurt. Here’s how part of the conversation went with my physician, Dr. Steve Daugherty:

ME:  Steve,  I’ve heard that  cardiovascular exercise can prolong life.  Is this true?

STEVE: Your heart only good for so many beats, and that’s it… Don’t waste them on exercise.  Everything wears out eventually.  Speeding up your heart will not make you live longer; it’s like saying you extend the life of a car by driving faster.  Want to live longer?  Take a nap.

ME: Should I reduce my alcohol intake?
STEVE:  No, not at all.  Wine is made from fruit.  Brandy is distilled wine, that means they take water out of fruity bit so you get even more of the goodness that way.  Beer is also made of grain.  Bottoms up!

ME: How  can I calculate my body/fat ratio?
STEVE: Well, if you have a body and you have fat, your ratio is one to one.  If you have two bodies, your ratio is two to one, etc.

ME: What  are some of  the advantages of participating in a regular exercise program?
STEVE:  Can’t think of single one, sorry.  My philosophy is: No pain…good!

ME:  Aren’t fried foods bad for you?
STEVE:  YOU ARE  NOT LISTENING!  Foods are fried these days in vegetable oil.  In fact, they are permeated by it.  How could getting more vegetable be bad for you?!?  

ME:  Will  sit-ups help prevent me from getting a little soft around the middle?
STEVE:  Definitely not!  When you exercise a muscle, it gets bigger.  You should only be doing sit-ups if you want a bigger stomach.  

ME:  Is chocolate bad for me?
STEVE:  Are you crazy?!?  HEL-LO-O!!  Cocoa beans!  Another vegetable!  Its the best feel-good food around!

ME:  Is swimming good for your figure?
STEVE:  If swimming is good for your figure, explain the whale to me..

ME:  Is getting in shape important for my lifestyle?
STEVE:  Hey!  ‘Round’ is shape!

To tell you what a great physician Dr. Daugherty is, he sent me home with a prescription that said “For Kelly Watts” at the top. It then listed three things:

1. Patient needs deep tissue upper and lower back massage daily.
2. Don’t nag. Be a part of the solution.
3. Frequent sex as often as patient indicates need.

He really did send that home with me. I think I may frame it. When my wife read what he’d written she said “That’s why men go to male doctors.” What do you think she meant by that?

Dr. Steve Daugherty is his name. He’s at the Ferrell-Duncan Clinic in Springfield. He’s a fabulous physician. I’d highly recommend him. The only thing wrong with him is he never reads my blog. We’ll see if this gets his attention.

Love ya, Steve.