I received a compliment this week. It wasn’t necessarily meant as one. It was just an observation, but it complimented me. A fellow said to me “I sense a calmness in you.”

Indeed. I feel more calm today than perhaps ever in my 48 years.

In Ecclesiastes this morning I read about “The quiet words of the wise…” (v 9:17) and that “calmness can lay great errors to rest.” (v 10:4)

There’s a thought: How many raging fires exist in your life because there was a little spark caused by friction—-and there is friction everywhere, everyday—and in frustration and anger you threw gasoline on the spark? I’d hate to think about how many heart-acres I have scorched because I didn’t exhibit calmness. I’m reminded that Proverbs 15:1 says “A gentle answer turns away wrath.”

Where does calm come from? Is it just an age thing? Only to the extent that time allows you to dig your well deeper.

I think calmness comes from depth. Shallow water has turbulent ripples but deep water is calm. Calmness comes from depth. Where does depth come from?

Depth—deep—-dig, Ah Ha! You gotta dig to get to depth. Dig what? I think your own heart.

My pastor friend, Hosea Bilyeu, has repeatedly encouraged me to listen slowly, think deeply, pray fervently, and obey faithfully. Pause to consider the first two thoughts. Listen slowly implies carefully considering what you hear. Don’t be rushing to formulate your answer. Think deeply. Shallow thinking produces shallow answers that hit us like cotton candy. They may sound good, but they quickly melt to nothing. Deep thinking sometimes—not always—produces profound thoughts and solutions that change the course of our life.

You can’t dig to depth, or think deeply in the midst of noise, and it’s a noisy world. Phones ring. Kids scurry through. Spouses need things. Text messages ding. The computer shouts “You’ve got mail!” All the while the TV or radio blares in the background and we have the temerity to say “I’m thinking.” Not so much.

Learning and growing can’t take place in a life that is noisy. It requires ingestion of ideas through great books, podcasts, conversations & travel. Then it requires digestion of what you’ve ingested. Some of it will help you learn and grow while some just produces waste. You separate the good from the bad as you dig deep into the ideas, and into your heart, and evaluate what you find in comparison to what you know is truth. Thus, you grow. And, somewhere on the other side of that growth, comes calm.

It’s a chaotic world out there. Politically. Economically. Socially. Your internal world is chaotic, too. Relationships. Finances. Fears. All of these things produce friction that is sometimes too much to bear, and when we can’t stand it anymore we spew gasoline on the sparks all the while wondering why we are having to continually fight fires.

You, your family, the people you work with, even the world needs your calm.

Get a shovel, and start digging.

Listen slowly.

Think deeply.

Pray fervently.

Serve faithfully.

—From Pastor Hosea Bilyea

When someone asks lots of questions that is a good sign. Questions indicate curiosity, and I’ve become convinced that curiosity is a necessary component to personal development, leadership and accomplishment.

People who are curious and inquisitive about all manner of things have a broad knowledge base. They can converse across a staggering array of topics. This makes them valuable to the team they work with, and the company they work for. They are problem solvers precisely because the breadth of their knowledge base can draw on such a wide variety of resources to solve a problem.

When you ask alot of questions just because you like to know how stuff works, you get a lot of different answers. You learn how different industries, different people, different cultures, different disciplines think and operate. All that information goes into the melting pot and creates the Stew that is You. That latent information lying in your brain suddenly comes to life while you are exercising, or taking a shower, or sitting in your favorite thinking chair. If you are like me, those are the times when you are essentially problem solving…..thinking about ways to fix or enhance things. Suddenly a concept you didn’t even know you knew launches an exercise in thinking that produces a new solution to your problem, or a new strategy for capitalizing on an opportunity. It all happened because a dozen years ago you got curious and asked a lot of questions.

I remember being on a Chamber of Commerce tour of a small company in Southern Arkansas that built the dump beds that go on the back of dump trucks. It was very interesting (how do they roll that steel into that shape) to learn about their business, who their customers were, how they got into the business, what supply and distribution problems they faced, how much their product sold for, where they found skilled workers, how they motivated employees, and what kinds of margins they operated on (yes, I ask the money questions). I recall that the rest of the half-dozen or so people on the tour just kind of stood around with their hands in their pockets and that at one point the lady giving the tour turned to me and enthusiastically said “You ask a lot of good questions!”

My buddy Jon Brownfield and I toured a cigarette manufacturing company once. Why? To see how they make cigarette’s, dummy. Just this year Jim Woolums and I toured the Louisville Slugger factory in of all places……..Louisville. Why? Well, because that’s the touristy thing to do in Louisville, silly. (Caught ya there didn’t I?)

Another friend—the Chief Resident at the University Hospital—took me into surgery once. Why? I asked. We saw butts, breasts and brains. It was really interesting. I’ll never forget watching them use hammers and saws on this lady’s knee and thinking: This is just glorified carpentry. It is!

Now, I can’t point you to any great decisions I’ve made as a leader, or even any great achievements in my personal life because I toured the dump truck, cigarette & baseball bat factories, but I do believe that four decades worth of  inquiry in various and assundry places has produced a library of knowledge that has helped me to be successful and that impacts my company and the people around me.  Just yesterday a brief conversation about the U.S. Postal service came up and out popped a piece of information about designing a mailer that could affect it’s deliverability. Where did that info come from? I don’t know. I didn’t even realize it was there. It’s just something I knew.

I’ve never thought about curiosity much, and only recently has it occurred to me that a person’s measure of curiosity might be a good indicator of their fitness for leading a company to achievement. My theory may or may not be right. It’s just that I think much of what makes me uniquely qualified to do what I do is rooted in my broad knowledge based which was built by asking lots of questions. My business partner even jokes that the first time we ever sat down and had lunch together he felt like he was on the witness stand. Of course, he’s too sensitive! But I’ll bet I did ask a lot of questions. Why? Because I wanted to know him.

As proof that I’m not the only curious one in our midst, I had dinner with a physician this evening—a bonafide Medical Doctor—who wants to get a Masters degree in Theology. Why? He’s curious. He wants to learn.

Cultivating Curiosity

If you buy into my theory that curiosity is important to achievement and success, what follows are some suggestions on how you might cultivate it within yourself.

#1. Be interest in other people and experiences other than your own. I’m generally interested in people and what their experiences are. I like to know about their religion, how they grew up, why they picked the mate they did, and why they listen to the kind of music they do—what about THAT music engages them? I enjoy people who can answer those why questions without feeling defensive. No offense is intended. I just wondered how their mind worked.

If you aren’t interested in other people, it is possible that you are too self-absorbed. If that hits a nerve I’ve got some advice for you: get over yourself. It’s not about you. There are many talented, interesting people in the world. Seek them out and learn from them.

#2. Ask philosophical questions that start with WHY and WHAT. Why did you choose this as your life’s work? Why do you vote Republican? Why do/don’t you exercise regularly? Why don’t you like any ice cream but vanilla? Why is your desk arranged in that manner? What do you think about……..whatever topic you want to bring up. What did you think of…….the most recent thing in the news. You learn a lot about how a person is wired using what and why questions. It’s amazing what people will tell you if you’ll just ask.

I’m convinced that we live way too much of our lives in intellectual and spiritual isolation because we are afraid to ask people questions. As a result, we have to figure out many things for ourselves when we could have learned from others and saved ourselves some pain if we’d have only asked.

#3. Read. Reading books, periodicals, newsletters, blogs and professional journals cultivates an inquisitive mind and stimulates curiosity. Personally, I digest a couple of daily newspapers, three or four magazines a month, and probably 50 books a year. I use reading services and tools to sort internet information that is most likely to be of interest to me. Recently I challenged the leaders of my company to read at least one book a month in order to grow themselves so they could continue to be the kind of leaders worthy of all those who are depending on us (Core Value #1).

If you aren’t a good reader, read! Proficiency will increase by doing.

#4. Travel. You don’t have to go far. I’ve been fortunate to see much of North America and parts of Asia, Europe and Latin America, but there are many opportunities to stimulate your thinking within a couple of hours of where you live. If you are in my neck of the woods, Eureka Springs, Sam Butcher’s Precious Moments museum, George Washington Carver’s Historic site, or the music festival in Mountain View, Arkansas are good places to start. I think the whiskey trail in and around Lexington, KY where my friend Jim lives would be interesting. How do they make that stuff and what’s the difference between whiskey, bourbon, and all those other liquors? While in KY I’d tour a Thoroughbred farm.

From liquor and racehorses to religion—–when I’m in Charlotte I want to tour the Billy Graham museum and home place. In Springfield, Ill I toured the funeral museum once. In northeastern Ohio learn from the Amish. How about swimming with the manatees in Florida? What is it with those rocks in Arizona?

Oh, what a wonderful world full of interesting experiences!

Well, I think I’ve made my point. A mark of an effective communicator is that he knows when to shut up and I’ve likely beaten a dead horse. But I really do think I’m on to something here. As I go forward in life, I’m going to try to surround myself with curious people who are interested in things, ideas, and other people. I want to hang out with big, crazy, “what if” kinds of thinkers. My friend Ken Channel calls them “guys who play intellectual pitch.”

Curiosity may have indeed killed the cat. But I’m pretty sure it’ll make you and me healthier, wealthier, and wiser.

Now, go learn something.